Jesse, after years of trepidation, I finally made the decision and applied for a Masters Program I had longed dreamt of applying for. I realized after all these years if my heart still hoped for that path, it was time to make the decisions that would transform that dream into a reality. Thank you always for your beautiful words xx
Thanks for taking time to say hey/...simplify that's what my late wife, poet and painter, Joie Cook always said. Reminding me to stay in the here and Now.
I pray for that you found your decision. Sometimes being impulsive can be good too. I'm curious, where do you live that you cannot work from home, as I do. Are you living under a train on Broadway? Your mom seems to work from home or in coffee shops. My daughter loves working in coffee shops.
Piles of books and papers everywhere, and a refrigerator fully stocked with locally sourced fresh vegetables, I have a source of energy to get back on track. Thank you for your encouraging call to take action.
I read this earlier in the week at a point when it was so timely, it was as if I had dreamed it into my inbox.
I'm currently deciding which agents to pitch for my debut novel--an uphill battle, I know. It seems so impossible--with so much at stake--that rather than diving in, I look at my Excel spreadsheet and want to reach for my pacifier and cry.
However...after reading your post I starting thinking that for me, so much of the fear and indecisiveness is tied to regret--the regret I anticipate that will come from feelings of "not getting it right.' But what is "getting it right?" It's not like there is any divining tool available for agent selection...So at some point, you just have to trust that no matter what the outcome, your decision will have been the one you needed to make.
THANK YOU for the sweet way you care about and for your community with posts such as these. 💜
"Six Walks in the Footsteps of Henry David Thoreau" by Ben Shattuck is a small poignsnt well written little book i have lingered over for months
i bet you (and your mom) would tressure it....he is an artist as well and its illustrated personal and with Thoreau mixed in respectively (how could it NOT be!🙏)
Day has started well here too ! Just checking in, sounds like you are busy, bust do not feel under any sort of pressure to post daily. It's about you after all !!
Ohh thank you - I only post weekly not daily! That would be amazing 😅😅but I usually write my post on Monday and post on Tuesday morning (sometimes also on Thursday)💖💖it’s nice to have that anchor at the start of the week
I am a big fan of "sleeping on it" in a specific way. I've been at a crossroads before where it felt like I had 2 (sometimes 3) choices. Often it's deciding to do or not do something. Move. Take that job. Quit that job. Have that conversation.
Anyway, one thing that gets me out of a swirl is to just decide. Knowing I can change my mind, but going to bed with the decision. My sleep that night, having decided, always informs me. If I'm not sure, I decide the other way the following night and sleep on it. It has always served me well. My subconscious (whatever you believe that to be) steps in and provides insight. I've told friends about this technique when they are struggling to decide something and they tell me it works for them, too.
"In Search of Lost Time, The Way by Swann's", Marcel Proust wrote of home by saying the places we have known do not exist solely by the greater conveniences of memory that we give them. Instead, they were only a thin slice among a series of connected impressions which formed our life at the time; the memory we have of them is regret for a moment, and fleeting as everything else.. I thought this was interesting to mention because while looking for new quarters to work and live, how many times I found certain aspects about each that were contained in a memory of some other place. And yet, practically speaking, the most useful path to discover a new abode is often a feeling, a sense of comfort, or distinguishing characteristics about it that are most suitable for what I feel will provide the greatest comfort and joy, including location, cost, and accessibility to accomplish a task or project most effectively. On another way of seeing, a space we occupy also has greater reverence for self expression, political favor, and possibility to succeed. I enjoy your Substack very much, and appreciate this interactive self meditation. This is most unique; an emotional pilgrimage and forage to bring something of value back. Thank you for allowing us to be part of this, Jesse.
Thank you for writing this thought provoking, uplifting, and poetic piece about the strange nature of decision. My younger sister is terrible with decisions. Her indecisive nature stems from this very idea that you wrote about so beautifully. For each choice, she sees a million possibilities, like Henry looking at and weighing in on the benefits of every possible farm in his surrounding area. At the end of your piece, as I read your final paragraph about patron saints, I did a double take. My little sister is named Claire. She is literally the namesake for saint of indecision. Learning that bit of information made my day. Thank you.
Jesse, after years of trepidation, I finally made the decision and applied for a Masters Program I had longed dreamt of applying for. I realized after all these years if my heart still hoped for that path, it was time to make the decisions that would transform that dream into a reality. Thank you always for your beautiful words xx
Thanks for taking time to say hey/...simplify that's what my late wife, poet and painter, Joie Cook always said. Reminding me to stay in the here and Now.
I love what you shared about the saints. I am a lapsed Catholic, but lately feel myself being pulled back. Your reverence adds to that.
I pray for that you found your decision. Sometimes being impulsive can be good too. I'm curious, where do you live that you cannot work from home, as I do. Are you living under a train on Broadway? Your mom seems to work from home or in coffee shops. My daughter loves working in coffee shops.
Remember to live while one is alive, that’s good advice. Thanks!
Piles of books and papers everywhere, and a refrigerator fully stocked with locally sourced fresh vegetables, I have a source of energy to get back on track. Thank you for your encouraging call to take action.
I read this earlier in the week at a point when it was so timely, it was as if I had dreamed it into my inbox.
I'm currently deciding which agents to pitch for my debut novel--an uphill battle, I know. It seems so impossible--with so much at stake--that rather than diving in, I look at my Excel spreadsheet and want to reach for my pacifier and cry.
However...after reading your post I starting thinking that for me, so much of the fear and indecisiveness is tied to regret--the regret I anticipate that will come from feelings of "not getting it right.' But what is "getting it right?" It's not like there is any divining tool available for agent selection...So at some point, you just have to trust that no matter what the outcome, your decision will have been the one you needed to make.
THANK YOU for the sweet way you care about and for your community with posts such as these. 💜
I think this qualifies as a post about something 😘
The perfect location is already selected for you all you have to do is pay attention.
Good luck
Wow- three cups going at once! I am also a big tea drinker.
Today I'm going to the Model Train Museum to get ideas for a diorama I'm working on.
Thanks for Wed. AM bulletin!
MJS
"Six Walks in the Footsteps of Henry David Thoreau" by Ben Shattuck is a small poignsnt well written little book i have lingered over for months
i bet you (and your mom) would tressure it....he is an artist as well and its illustrated personal and with Thoreau mixed in respectively (how could it NOT be!🙏)
Day has started well here too ! Just checking in, sounds like you are busy, bust do not feel under any sort of pressure to post daily. It's about you after all !!
Ohh thank you - I only post weekly not daily! That would be amazing 😅😅but I usually write my post on Monday and post on Tuesday morning (sometimes also on Thursday)💖💖it’s nice to have that anchor at the start of the week
My work life is erratic and I try and not panic about it and enjoy the extra time I have while reflecting on the next step to take.
Great post Jesse. Thank you. X
I am a big fan of "sleeping on it" in a specific way. I've been at a crossroads before where it felt like I had 2 (sometimes 3) choices. Often it's deciding to do or not do something. Move. Take that job. Quit that job. Have that conversation.
Anyway, one thing that gets me out of a swirl is to just decide. Knowing I can change my mind, but going to bed with the decision. My sleep that night, having decided, always informs me. If I'm not sure, I decide the other way the following night and sleep on it. It has always served me well. My subconscious (whatever you believe that to be) steps in and provides insight. I've told friends about this technique when they are struggling to decide something and they tell me it works for them, too.
"In Search of Lost Time, The Way by Swann's", Marcel Proust wrote of home by saying the places we have known do not exist solely by the greater conveniences of memory that we give them. Instead, they were only a thin slice among a series of connected impressions which formed our life at the time; the memory we have of them is regret for a moment, and fleeting as everything else.. I thought this was interesting to mention because while looking for new quarters to work and live, how many times I found certain aspects about each that were contained in a memory of some other place. And yet, practically speaking, the most useful path to discover a new abode is often a feeling, a sense of comfort, or distinguishing characteristics about it that are most suitable for what I feel will provide the greatest comfort and joy, including location, cost, and accessibility to accomplish a task or project most effectively. On another way of seeing, a space we occupy also has greater reverence for self expression, political favor, and possibility to succeed. I enjoy your Substack very much, and appreciate this interactive self meditation. This is most unique; an emotional pilgrimage and forage to bring something of value back. Thank you for allowing us to be part of this, Jesse.
Its Thursday Morning 8:00AM Manila-Philippines.
Thank you for writing this thought provoking, uplifting, and poetic piece about the strange nature of decision. My younger sister is terrible with decisions. Her indecisive nature stems from this very idea that you wrote about so beautifully. For each choice, she sees a million possibilities, like Henry looking at and weighing in on the benefits of every possible farm in his surrounding area. At the end of your piece, as I read your final paragraph about patron saints, I did a double take. My little sister is named Claire. She is literally the namesake for saint of indecision. Learning that bit of information made my day. Thank you.