My Grandmother's Birthday

Honoring ancestry on my Grandma's birthday <3

Today, March 19th, is the birthday of my maternal grandmother, Beverly Smith.

I started writing about her this morning, and as the memories poured out I had a funny feeling I had already shared them with you before. I remembered then that I wrote this post for her birthday last year.

“I feel deeply fortunate for the simple fact that I am made in part from her. She is a figure I draw power and courage from, a person I try to access when I need a little more fire, a little more boldness. Hearing stories of her life and personality, understanding who she was, I feel honored to carry her within me, to be able to channel her energy when I need to do something that feels extra challenging, or that requires a little more self confidence than I’m sometimes able to muster on my own. A little audacity, a bit of chutzpah - qualities she had in spades.”

“Today is the birthday of my Grandma, Beverly Ann Williams. She was born 1920 in Bridgeport, Connecticut, and marrying a Smith man, she became a Smith herself in 1946. Beverly had a life full of experience equipped with hardship, grief, hard work, and I’m definitely sure, a lot of exciting and wonderful moments, too. I wish I could ask her about all of it, listen to her stories and take in every single word, far more precious than any gold on earth. She died in 2002 when I was 15 and she was 82.”

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Most of us had such little time shared with the older generations of our families. As swiftly as they appeared, welcoming us to the world, bright and booming, full of light - they were gone. I loved my Grandma when I was a little girl. And I know she loved me, too. There was a palpable and gentle admiration between us. It doesn’t take anything for me to access it now. In a flash of thought, I am 4 years old, standing at the doorway of her kitchen, watching in awe, secretly waiting.

I love that her birthday is always on or around the Spring Equinox, occurring tomorrow at 5:01am ET. For me, she is the epitome of Spring - a bold awakening, the embodiment of survival, of growth and new beginnings, ready for action, ready for anything. And I know from my mom and aunt that she loved her flowers - daisies, geraniums, baby’s breath, mimosa trees. When I think about her, I feel honored to be only 2 generations from her, to have real memories to choose from, to be able to feel her near me, to access her so easily. It’s a reminder of the elasticity of time - our years together were fewer than I’d want, but our visits so rich and full, and today within a moment, I can be there once again.

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In the comments, I would love if you can share about your grandmother, any or all of your grandparents, someone special from your past, and how you keep their legacy and teachings alive in your heart. If you would like to share photos, please do so in the Chat, which offers the same prompt today. It’s so important we keep their life memberships renewed and their stories remembered on all days throughout the year, and that we give each other the time and space to share stories, as well. It’s so easy to forget where we came from, the generations and lines of individuals who made is possible for us to experience life today. Not only can we learn from those in our own ancestral family, but we can learn from each other’s too. As we move through life, we carry these lines of people within us. When we walk with a friend through the park, we walk with their past and their people, as well.

If you have a family tree available, another nice exercise is to choose someone from your distant ancestry, learn their name, their birthday, where they were born and lived, and look at their photo if you can locate it somewhere. Spend a little time thinking about who they were, how their life might have been. Imagine what they looked like, laughed like, how their voice sounded, how they dressed, where they went everyday. Who were their friends, what did they like and dislike? What music did they hear, what food did they eat? How did it feel just to walk with them, sit with them. It’s amazing the people whose stories we carry just by being alive. We might share a distinctive feature or carry one of their signature traits, and we would never know. It’s nice to imagine though, that lifetimes before, there was an ancestor just like you, who would love and understand you in a particular way that nobody else has. We might not be able to meet them, but somewhere, somehow, us just being here and doing what we do could be truly healing for their heart, soothing to their soul.

I’ve written often about my maternal grandmother, and maybe my dear friend Hillary Harrison of

Keepsake

can help me share the story of my paternal grandmother, Kathleen Smith (née Bias), born and raised in West Virginia, where my father was also born. Kathleen died 30 years ago, February 9, 1995, and while her story feels nearly forgotten, I think her memory could be beautifully revived by Hillary’s Daughters of Appalachia series. :) We have a call tomorrow to talk about ideas for our next collaborations, so maybe that can be one of them. <3

Thank you all for reading, and thank you to those in our ancestral past who brought us here today. Happy Birthday to my Grandma, Beverly, born 105 years ago today.

We miss you and love you, and we carry you with us always. <3